ExpertDabbler

Psychology of a creative guy

The first thing for a designer or for that matter any creativeguy is to have unquestionable faith in his ability.

There are times when one would just go blank. The pen doesn’t move for the writer, the musician doesn’t hear notes, the photographer could not think about a composition idea.

It is sheer faith which helps one get through those moments. Persons with infinite self belief tend to make great creative personalities.

Faith is the only aptitude needed for any creative effort.

One interesting fact I read today. Adolph Hitler tried his hand in drawing and painting during his adolescent years. Later he tried to join Architecture school but to no avail. I somehow feel had he been admitted then, we would’ve seen a different Hitler. Ifs and Buts run the world.

This morning, my neighbor and his wife had started for temples around Chennai in a Call Taxi. They had been to Nanganallur and then had gone to Sholinganallur nearby. By noon, he had experienced giddiness and had gone unconscious. He was rushed to a hospital nearby where he was treated in ICU. He was pronounced dead at 3.30 pm at noon.

At a philosophical level, it just goes to show how short and temporary our stay in this world is. Coffee day has a caption “A lot can happen over coffee”.
I couldn’t agree more. Earlier today they had consulted an astrologer in Sholinganallur who has said things will be great in future. So much for astrological predictions.

At a medical level, it shows yet another instance of heart disease striking when you least expect it. A cardiac patient, he had undergone angioplasty few months back.
He had been going for regular check-ups as late as last Tuesday.
His physician had said his heart was stable and that there’s nothing to worry. He had been asked to come for the next check up only after a month.

Socially, this death had left me with numerous questions. His son is in the US. It’s going to take some time to reach Vedaranyam (that’s their native).
The body is right now waiting for the final send off by the son after he reaches India
(A good two days away).

The symptoms, the quickness of death is very much reminiscent of appa’s death.

Sometimes I used to think about my future plans and how I am going to achieve that.

That’s how kind or cruel life is, depending on how one sees life.

I love writing.
In emails i put forth my views.
My thinking evolves as i write on something.
My writing is much more sensible than my conscious self.
Some of the mails i’d written helps me in no uncertian terms when i face a particular situation at a later stage.
So in a sense i write my own reference and then get back to it when needed.

Usually i start writing with a viewpoint,then i handle its opposite,thus my view takes birth - refined and reformed.
i would definitely say karthik the person is better now than what he was before he started writing.
i am connecting to my higher self through this wonderful medium. in that sense its more like a prayer, a meditation.
five minutes before i had not thought about what i am going to write in my blog and now i am almost through with it.

Eckhart Tolle said in his “Power of Now” that true creation originates from being present at that moment. How true…

Couple of days back, I was speaking over phone to Sathya, one of my close friends here in Chennai. He comes from a very different background. He had been through lots of distractions and diversions in his teen years. Had I been in his environment, I might’ve been a criminal by now.

Sathya was talking about how difficult it is to find the veins in a patient. The hospital staff struggles a great deal to find the vein and administer the dosage not to mention the pain it cause for the patients already under distress. He said he wanted to find a method to solve this.

I encouraged him to pursue his dreams. After all, anything which aims to reduce patients suffering is worth supporting. In course of the talk, I was suggesting about how he can improve his knowledge - scientific and in other general aspects by visiting sites like howstuffworks.com. That particular moment I caught myself telling him that if he learns one new concept in a day, he would know a lot in a year.Something inside me snapped “if only I had implemented that”.

Another reason to speak one’s mind. If one has the willingness to reflect what they say, they can catch a glimpse of the guru in them.

Over the years, most of my friends have got married.
The only hitch is that they along with the elders form an alliance to ask “Unakku Eppo”.
Ah! That is the difficult part. So far I’ve maintained 2005 or 2006.

But I just don’t know if I need a marriage as such.
I have never been head over heels in love nor do I think that will happen in the near future. Am far too casual for that. I’m not a great believer in arranged marriages either.
i would like to see if there is any other way.
other than the indian arranged arranged marriage or the typical love marriage.
its all a bit confusing.
So I guess I should safely remain bachelor and do things in which am a lot clearer.

I was humming the piano piece in “Nee partha” (Hey Ram) and started thinking about who would make the Best Indian Movie personality of the Century. I mean someone who has elevated his discipline and whose work is inseparable from the masses.

My Choice would be ‘The Himalaya of Music’ Ilayaraja.

Forget his fragile ego. Forget his eccentricities. In terms of talent and variety after an astonishing 800 films(app.), he is the Numero Uno of Tamil Music - film or otherwise.

I could not think of any other personality whose life has been half as astonishing as him. Hailing from deprived surroundings with no background in Chennai Filmdom, this genius has been able to touch the entire Tamil community with his out of this world scores. He has been the crowning glory of Tamil Nadu.

Kamal said the other day that in his opinion when it comes to BGMs, there is none better the Mozart of Madurai.

I couldn’t agree more.

Usually one tends to relate to the emotions in music during the teens.

I was in my childhood and pre-teens when he reigned supreme in Tamil Cinema but I could still relate to the emotions of those songs now - a good 20 years after it was composed when I see it on television.

I like Rahman, especially his work for Mani Ratnam and other famous directors but when it comes to evoking the emotions in me, Raja the King is light years ahead.

In a sense it is a tragedy that he was born in Tamil Nadu, for we have a nasty reputation when it comes to honoring and recognizing genius.

Another aspect I’ve noticed is, City bred youths take more easily to Rahman and people like me who has been exposed to folk music of South Tamil Nadu tend to worship Raja for ever.

In my opinion, he is to Tamil music what Valluvar is to Tamil literature.

This morning, as I was entering Landmark Nungambakkam, one boy( should about 12-13 yrs old), came towards me and introduced himself as one coming from Help Age India (an NGO).He kindly requested me to donate a small money for a good cause.
I was willing to give Rs.20 with the Rs.50 I had.
As soon I asked him to write 20 bucks in the books, he curtly told me the minimum amount they expect from donor is Rs. 50.
I was outraged, changed my mind and walked away without giving anything.
Who are these NGOs to fix the minimum amount for donors?
Does that mean that the 20 bucks I intended to give is too trivial for them?
How do they expect anyone to part with 50 bucks just like that?
Charity la enna minimum limit?
Maybe the boy thought about the limits on his own.
Maybe nowhere has the NGO prescribed such things in their official documents / brochures.
Still, that boy is the one who represented the NGO at that time.
If they are sending kids to collect money on their behalf, obviously it’s their responsibility to groom the kids to behave.

A background on why I chose this nickname for my blog.
It’s an oxymoron I coined for myself. I feel this explains my personality in a succinct way.

Some of my friends consider me as bits and pieces guy who has potential but who doesn’t have a focus to do anything worthwhile. It is not totally untrue. Let us see why they see me that way.

As I entered my teen years, I was very interested in photography, just as when the rest of the world thought I will be keen to pursue it more as a hobby, I wanted to make it my career. Then suddenly I looked the Commerce way and was studying Accountancy, Economics from scratch. At a later stage, I tried to become an MBA. And then I chose multimedia, web design, graphic design and that is where I am right now.

Interests wise I am into Photography, Creative writing, Astrology, Handwriting Analysis (for a brief while though), Palm reading, Programming,
Body Language, Management Literature, Self Improvement Literature, Instrumental Music, Indian Classical and Western Music.

Over a period of time, by virtue of efforts and questions on my part to find answers to questions like Who I am, What turns my spirits on, My strengths etc. I have come to a theme- Discovering new innovative ideas/ opinions/views and Expressing /Communicating that to the world audience in a manner which might help them consider those ideas, in turn form their own ideas and make better persons out of them.

This blog, my unsolicited mails to my friends list and a host of other things can be traced to this operating philosophy.

So over the last couple of years, I have been more involved in this theme. The fact that I am happier, more confident, more comfortable about my personality than all the years is convincing enough to suggest that this is what turns me on.

However though I have zeroed in the essence of my career/life might be in general; I am yet to focus on the exact vehicles/mediums/platforms for doing work in this theme.

My focus swings from User interface Design to Application Development to creative writing to developing animation to writing games.
It’s tough to discard some as of now. Maybe as time moves on there might be consolidation on that too.

One thing in which I think I am good at is expressing verbally. So I thought about writing a book on multi faceted personalities. The reason for such a topic was I’ve seen people who are top class System Software Engineers who want to make that one documentary but who never realize that dream it citing practical difficulties, domestic issues, budgets etc. The fact is they are not alone and I wanted to show how acclaimed people have been able to cross similar even tougher hurdles.

Also I know a few people who have been exceptionally good in their area without any formal qualifications.

One Mr. Mani Ratnam is basically an MBA graduate. Ram Gopal Verma started his career in the construction industry.

The versatile Kamal Hassan has never bothered about academic qualifications.
Sujatha has not undergone any course in creative writing nor in screenplay writing.
Cartoonist Madhan is a physics graduate with an interest for everything under the sun.

On the international level, Peter F Drucker, The guru’s guru in management began his career as a journalist. Scott Adams of Dilbert fame has a very interesting background.

I started this project by forming a few questions and tried to get in touch with one interesting personality in Ohio, but somehow he has turned cold on that.
I might get in touch with Sujatha Sir himself here.

Regarding my zooming on a particular platform, I’ve let that process take its own course.The only title i’m comfortable is author i guess.
Only time can answer that.

Regarding the way some consider me, well I guess at least I am not a yuppie whose life can be summed up like Birth-School-College-Career-Love-Marriage-Children-Disease-Death. Also the major victim of my eccentricity (if one could call that) has been myself and to a limited extent my parents.
The major beneficiary will be my friends and in future, my wife and children and this whole world when i leave this planet.

How difficult is Chennai to a villager who migrates here for survival? Quite difficult I guess.
I remember those days when accompanied Ramna to Chennai in 1995.
That was my first leisure visit to Chennai. It was also the first time I realized that this is not a jolly place to visit. Being from Coimbatore, I know how a city boots itself up at dawn till it shuts down business around midnight. But still I was completely overawed by the pace of life here. Frankly, Kovai’s pace is half that of Chennai’s pace during a weekend. I am fortunate not to have been exposed to Mumbai’s rhythm as yet.

The only time I like Chennai roads is when I leave office around midnight. Save for the patrol police, the ride will be by and large smooth.
In fact after sometime, the patrol police at Perambur Bridge were so used to me that they waved off as soon as they saw my vehicle.

I see my cousins struggling in their first days in Chennai looking for that elusive job. The had a small provision business in their native and bless the globalization and the prospects it had for agriculture, all the villages are taking their next bus to Chennai and Chennai metro water is prompt in sending their next tanker lorry to these villages to scrap as much ground water as possible.
I am reminded of the famous one-liner in Nayagan ”Avanai Nirutha Sol. Naan Nirutharen”

If this Union and State governments had been any smart, they should never have allowed a guy like me to immigrate to Chennai, much less buy a flat here.